six jokes
Ret's ESL Jokes
One day, a wife calls her husband and says, “be careful driving home — the radio is saying that some total moron is driving down the wrong side of the motorway.”
The husband replies, “There’s not just one, honey, there are hundreds of them!”
I remember fondly my grandaddy’s last words: “Stop shaking that ladder, you moron!”
A guy walks up to a bar where two women are sitting and says, “Are you ladies from Ireland?”
They give him a dirty look and say, “Wales.”
“Oh, I’m sorry — are you two whales from Ireland?”
“Why did you leave your last job?” — “The company relocated and didn’t tell me where.”
A man wakes from a coma. His wife changes out of her black clothes and, irritated, remarks, “I really cannot depend on you in anything, can I?”
I went to the doctor’s. He said: “Don’t eat anything fatty.
“What...,” I asked. “Like bacon and burgers?”
He said, “No, Fatty. Don’t eat anything.”
Vocabulary
Moron: a very stupid person.
Motorway: a major road for fast traffic.
Relocated: moved to a different place.
The orange president is a moron.
The motorway was jammed with traffic. That’s why I’m late.
Our headoffice has relocated to Maseru.
Grammar Focus
Present simple: Used to tell jokes and general truths.
Reported speech: Used to recount what someone says.
Question tags: “Can I?” adds irony or complaint.
Synonyms & Alternatives
Moron: idiot, fool.
Guy: bloke, fellow.
Dirty look: glare, scowl.
Mini Dialogue
Wife: Be careful driving home.
Husband: There are hundreds of them!Man: Are you from Ireland?
Woman: No, I’m from Wales. And you?
🌱 If you enjoy this blog, consider buying me a coffee.