a couple in heaven
Ret's ESL Jokes
A man and his girlfriend die in a car accident and met Saint Peter at the gates of Heaven. Peter says: “Welcome to Heaven! Do you have any questions?”
The man replies: “Yes. My girlfriend and I never had the chance to get married while we were alive. Can we get married in Heaven?”
Peter says: “That’s a good question. I’ll come back when I have the answer.”
Left at the gates, the couple starts talking about love and how long eternity is. Six weeks later, Peter returns and says: “Okay, I got the answer. Yes, you can get married in Heaven. Come on in and enjoy eternity together.”
The couple then says: “We have another question. Eternity is really long, and we’re not sure our relationship will last forever. If it doesn’t work out, can we get a divorce in Heaven?”
“For fuck’s sake! It took me 6 weeks to find a priest up here — do you have the slightest idea how long it’ll take to find a bloody lawyer?!”
Vocabulary
Gates of Heaven: the symbolic entrance to the afterlife.
Work out: to succeed or function as hoped.
They met at the gates of Heaven.
They wondered whether things would work out.
Grammar Focus
The joke relies on past simple for narration and reported speech, with modal verbs to express uncertainty about the future.
Past simple: A man and his girlfriend died in a car accident.
Modal + bare infinitive: We’re not sure our relationship will last forever.
Synonyms & Alternatives
For fuck’s sake: for heaven’s sake, for goodness’ sake.
Lawyer: solicitor, barrister.
Mini Dialogue
Oliver: I’m not sure this plan will work out in the long run.
James: Give it time — no one knows how long it will last.
Oliver: For fuck’s sake, we haven’t even started yet.
James: Exactly — that’s why we’re still calm.